From my 2000 Spiritual Journal
June 8, 2000
What Might God Tell Me ...after my prayers?
Because you have believed in me, trusted me for your daily needs I have blessed you beyond measure, as many are blessed. Do you not have peace, though your life is as a tangled ball of string? Is not your mind at rest and no longer fearful, doubtful and full of thoughts that discourage? Seeing that you, of your own accord did not make this possible, give thanks to the God of mankind, the God who being just and merciful, loving, and wise beyond mans comprehension does what he promises to do - rewards the patient and faithful, the loyal and obedient, those who believe as a child believes.
You do have reason to be joyous, for the dark that held you in bondage all your life no longer holds you. Fear is of the devil, and will not be found within those who have learned to trust me.
These are solemn times, though most of mankind remains blind. Their eyes and ears remain closed as were the eyes and ears of past generations, who refusing to see and hear- did fall.
Do not take back that which you gave to me, and in all manner of things, remember the destruction and pain that wrong choices and a rebellious heart put into your life. Be faithful and true unto the God, who out of love for you untangled your life and set you on the right path again- lit it, and granted you wisdom to better understand things. Be open in heart and mind, receptive to the Holy Spirit, who will reveal things you're ignorant of. He will plant your feet and enlighten your mind, enabling you to see with clarity of vision.
Be not lifted up by men, whose affection for you blinds them to their lack of trust in me, and to the rebelliousness of their hearts, that same evil that rested upon your own heart in times past. Lift Christ HIGH before men. Tell everybody about the Savior who loving them so deeply, willingly laid down his life for them so that they could live.
Encourage all who will listen to abide in me. Encourage them to pray for the removal of all that now exists between us so that no wall is in the middle; so that they may come boldly to ME, asking with faith those things I desire to give them.
There is light that fills the inner man, granting him power to do all manner of things, but my people fear that which they are unsure of. Their doubt grieves me, for if a child of mine asks for bread why would I give then a stone?
You are loved, as are all those who love me, whose faith is a steady, dependable thing. Be patient, loving, and kind to those with a weaker faith; for did you not at one time have difficulty letting go of the negative things Satan put upon you?
Many people begin and end their days in fear. Do not do as they do, but continue to trust me and in my promises. Leave your loved ones with the God you trust. All men have to make their own decisions regarding life. Look to Christ and nevermore away, for darkness comes and I desire your safety- the safety of all who love me.
From my Spiritual Journal
June 18, 1999
Yesterday morning, I listened to part of a sermon. I missed most of it because I was turning channels to get the weather report when I stumbled across a Pastor just ending his sermon. I regret that I missed the beginning of it, for I know it would have been wonderful. I know this because his last sentence was "I've been forgiven much because God loves me so much."
Those words went straight to my heart, reminding me of the life I'd once lived; the person I was before asking Jesus to be the Lord of my life. The river rose in my eyes as I recalled how overwhelmed I'd been, how full of joy, when I finally understood that somebody not only loved me just as I was, but could and would, save me from myself; from all my self-destructive habits, from my low self-esteem, from my loneliness, my fears, my doubts and unkind acts; my disrespectful mouth, and from the hatred and resentfulness I carried towards all those who had hurt me so badly; those who robbed me of my childhood, my innocence, my joy, my hope- my very life.
I sat quietly, after hearing that last sentence, thinking of the kind of life I'd be living had it not been for Christ. How do you feel when reading the words"I'm forgiven much because God loves me so much?" Can you imagine your life now- without Him at the core of it? Imagine, for a moment, the most difficult, the most painful experience you've dealt with? What if there were no Christ to lift us up, to renew our hope, our faith, strength and courage? What if, when we prayed, we discovered we'd done it for nothing?
Remember when we first fell in love with the Lord? We wanted to spend every waking minute with him; reading what he said and learning the (why's) behind His words. It was impossible for us to be still; we just had to speak about him, had to share with anybody who would listen to us. Is it still that way? Do our hearts yet burn for him? Do we still allow everything else to wait just so we can spend a little bit more time with Him? Does he go to the table with us- like at first? Does he sit with us as we watch television? Is he beside us during the day, or does he only hear our voice when a crisis arises?
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From My spiritual journal
December 18, 1989
We don't have to fear the changes that will enter our lives. Our tomorrows will find God beside us, just as he was the day before and is today. He has been with us since we first asked Him into our hearts, and will be at our side until our last breath.
We'll experience many things in our lifetime: marriage, divorce, births, deaths, new jobs, loss of a job, owning a home- losing one, a happy family, a dysfunctional one, problems with our children, health problems, and many more, and God will be there to rejoice with us, or grieve with us, as always He's done.
"Lo, I am with you.." What comfort; what reassurance. God with us means: We will not be betrayed, won't be abandoned, will have somebody to trust, will have somebody with us through the long haul; somebody who won't bail out on us when things get rough. It means no matter how bright our days, or how dark the nights- He is at our side.
Life becomes more stressful every day. We need help in order to remain strong and courageous midst the storms of our lives, need help in order to be at peace. There is only one place to receive that peace, and that is through Christ, the God of All Comfort.
One of our sons, when he was but four years old, feared the dark. Even with a night-light on he'd have trouble falling asleep. Every night, I'd tuck him in and reassure him that I'd be in the next room, so he didn't have to worry or be afraid. Yet, every night, until sleep found him, he'd call out to me at regular intervals. "Mommy, are you still there?"
This is how we are with the Lord, when the stress of life has us hemmed in, when we are discouraged, weary, and afraid. It does not seem quite good enough that God says "Lo, I am with you all the appointed days."
We still call out to him in the dark of night, and sometimes in the bright of noon day, "Lord, are you still there?"
Jesus promised NEVER to forsake us. Let's believe him; let's praise Him for his faithfulness rather than be a doubting Thomas.
Make a wonderful memory today. Be good to others and just as good to yourselves. Have patience with all things, but mostly with yourselves. Don't become discouraged when considering your imperfections. We all have them. Don't forget that we are a work in progress. God isn't finished with us yet.
